The house is almost silent excpet for the sound of the fan blowing in Emilia's room. Twenty minutes ago however our house was the epicenter of noise and chaos. We are knee deep in what is known as the "Period of Purple Crying". Read about it here. I have heard of it described as the fourth trimester. The one where the baby adjusts to life outside of the womb. Several nights a week, from about 6 until about 10 or 11 in the evening Emillia cries. Not non-stop crying but it it very difficult to soothe her.
This is our third Period of Purple crying so we are almost veterans. We have a pretty big toolbox for dealing with this crying. The key is to find the perfect combination of bounce, sway, shush, and way to hold her that makes her comfortable enought to fall asleep for a while until the next crying jag starts. When they going really gets tough and nothing will calm her we put her into the carseat and swing it. This is the most effective way to calm her but it is back breaking work because the carseat and baby combination somehow weighs more than a mack truck.
The PURPLE crying comes at a terrible time for our family. I am the best at keeping Emilia happy (except for maybe aunt Liz, but she can't be here every night) so I end up bouncing and swaying and shushhing her while poor Tim (who has worked all day) makes dinner. The older girls see this time as an oportunity to tear the house apart because both mommy and daddy are occupied so the noise level at this point is at its peak. I am sure the whole neighborhood can hear us yelling, "Get off the TV! Don't hit her! Get out of the bathroom! Stop throwing things! Who colored on the couch?" Emilia is at her worst too. Crying, crying, crying! Once dinner is ready one of the two of us has to bounce, sway, and shushh while the other eats and tackles the dinner time struggle that I call, "get in your seat, eat your dinner." We seamlessly move from "get in your seat, eat your dinner" into "get your jammies on". By the time we get to "get your jammies on" Tim and I are both exhausted and grumpy. The sound of Emilia's crying is starting to penetrate the depths of my brain and I just want to go to bed. First we have to get the older girls to bed which usually goes pretty smooth once we get past "get your jammies on" and "don't eat the toothpaste, brush with it". By this time of night Emilia is starting to settle down some and we are one by one getting everyone in bed. Finally, about the time Sophia finally stops coming up with reasons to get out of bed, Emilia has a big, long nurse and falls asleep for the night. Tim comes down the stairs for the final time and falls into his chair. Most nights he half heartedly tries to get me to stay up with him and watch a movie or play video games. I give him an apologetic smile and climb the stairs, lay Emilia down, and fall into bed.
With Emilia we were hopeful she wouldn't be a PURPLE crying baby but we were prepared for her to be. When Sophia was this age Tim and I were totally surprised by evening crying. It was a really hard time for me. I was adjusting to being a mom (something I was totally unprepared for and struggled with) and once a day my baby would cry uncontrollably. It was difficult for me to bond with her because I was hating all of the crying. I felt like there was somethig wrong with her and that there was something wrong with the way I was parenting. We blamed my breastmilk. I loathed breastfeeding because everyone said she was fussy because of something I ate. I know now that wasn't the truth. When her pediatrician off handedly suggested that I give her formula I jumped at the chance to stop breastfeeding. When she was alseep I would feel anxious the whole time about her waking up and crying. It really was a horrible experience and its all because I didn't understand what was happening. I don't remember at what point things got better with her but they finally did. When Alyssa was born and the evening crying started up I found the PURPLE crying website. I really changed alot of things for me. It explained that evening crying was normal, that is was common, there was nothing wrong with the baby, and there was nothing wrong with my breastmilk. I went on to nurse her for 15 months and we stopped because we wanted to, not because I was hating it. After about 4 months things with Alyssa had improved alot.
Emilia was 7 weeks old on Saturday. Just 9 weeks to go...
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